I had every intention on writing my Month Two post tonight. I think it’s important and something I am committed to documenting little by little, but slowly my day has been swept away by good news and I find myself lacking the ability to be pensive or introspective. Mostly, I find myself excited and as this is an emotion that has been lacking of late (or a litany of reasons) I have decided to dwell in the here and now and soak up Excitement for all it offers.
Today was a beacon in otherwise rough terrain. I don’t mean to complain and I certainly don’t want to cast a more negative picture than the reality than exists so I will simply say the following: I have learned (and continue to learn) recently the necessity of living the life that exists rather than the life imagined or anticipated. It is of the utmost importance. I do not mean to say that one cannot dream or change — surely not. I simply mean that there is far more richness to be gained and growth to be offered when we accept the reality for what it is rather than what we prematurely envision it to be and from there begin. The brevity of three sentences in no way mirror the paramount of this lesson nor the time demanded in learning it. The process has held some very long days. I relay this as a measuring stick for the long-needed joy today held. It was a memory that craved awakening.
Can you then blame me to electing to revel in the joy and giddiness of today awhile longer? Surely not. It was long off and much needed. My heart mounts with the contentedness of community and the prospect of a new future. That is, a future of new dreams, untold and undiscovered. The lighthouse’s beam shone on today in its rotation, illuminating what was previously indecipherable and dormant. I choose not to shirk from the sudden and nearly blinding light but rather stand erect and absorb all that I am able while the clarity shines freely. I choose to embrace what surprises me rather than pass my time reeling in what I thought might be but is not. I choose to move forward.
The next steps of a new journey were laid before me; the exploration of a future flooded with prospect and risk, promise and uncertainty. So I took to the new path, and have felt joy radiate since.